SILENT CRIES OF THE HEART


How my heart beats at the thought of you...

I awake again to another day, I turned to look on the other side of the bed and you are not there and then I remembered, it was was all just a beautiful dream.
But, how can I make you see me, how can I make you see the intensity of what I feel for you, how can you not see that I am willing to walk away from everything else just to be able to watch the sun rise and set with you, how can you not want this passion, this love, this longing that is right in your face?



I try to be the good girl my African society and culture expects me to be; seeing you,  being with you, thinking about you and yet pretending to be in denial of that which fills me and ignites a fire that only you can put out.
Every time my phone beeps, I rush to it, silently wishing  in my heart that it would be you, texting or calling just to let me hear the sound of your voice.  I am even worried that you may have become my primary obsession. My friends say I am crazy but I guess I am past caring.


To you,  I may just be a friend, or even a colleague, or maybe a fan or just someone who just admires you, but Honey, I'd rather have you this close and bear the pain of you not loving me back in the way I silently scream for, than not having you close at all..


 How many times do I lie on the couch, imagining what it would feel like, cuddled in your arms, soothed by your kisses, loved with such tenderness and passion than I thought possible and treated as your queen, you may just never know...
 So, while I am here, lost in my desires of you, bombarded with imaginations of what could have been and what I still hope could be, I will love me, love my dreams just as passionately as I am in love with you.

 And hopefully, you will come around, or eventually get to see me in every way my heart has hoped for, or maybe there is a prince riding my way, searching the world for his princess waiting right here.



 The sound of the radio commercials interrupts...

Comments

  1. Gabriel12 December 2022 at 00:38

    When I read through these expressions of your heart I can't help, but see someone who can put down clearly what she's in search for. She knows what truly can satisfy her but better still she knows there will be a price...."I am will to walk away everything...". With this clarity of vision you can't miss it,NO you won't. Please consider yourself marriage.

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